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Funny, very funny to read back and funny to think of all that has changed. Let's see - The Orphanage is a very different place. I went from Tony, Jason, Alan, Zach and Nick to Tony and Max, to John and Max, and to Nick, Jenny (A GIRL!), Tony.
And oh, it's beautiful. Through the last year Jenny and I have repainted, reorganized and rethrifted (word?) the entire house. There are welcoming whites, glorious greens and...badger browns. We repainted all the bedrooms, kitchen, and hallways. I love it, I love it. Other than some nights spent in the "drunken stupor" vs. "let's make a fort from newspaper" - things have stayed pretty spic and span.
The biggest change?
Demon beings.

I've never loved cats. They are cute, funny, and ha-ha-it-fell, but I like them from five feet away. Don't touch me. We went from two cats that Jenny saved to SEVEN cats because their mother is a whore, to four cats because we gave "presents". The kittens were great though :)
Anyone want a kitten?

Angela and I have been playing Bennigans every week for two summers and a fall now. We miss playing outside, but since it's been cold we've been trying to make-do. I miss the stage, the candles, the incense, the draperies, the stars and night. Inside it sort of feels like we're playing at...Bennigans. On the lookout for a new venue, but until then we're every Saturday - and it's always a riot. Especially when Kalen and Tony play. It's like changing the patrons channel from Everybody Loves Raymond to Prairie Home Companion...on acid, naked (?). Been tough to find a new venue though if anyone has any suggestions. We know there are a lot of options in the cities, but nowhere in the suburbs really do anything like this - so we've been having a lot of success here. Has to be all ages, also - we have an eight year old who plays better than I do.

I'm out of a job now as of last week, hopefully temporarily at this place. I've been bartending in Anoka and it's my third bar in a row to close down. It's funny to me how people can still be in denial of the trickle-down effect when main street is being hit so hard. My patrons have the saddest stories; can you imagine being laid off a few years or MONTHS before retirement benefits? So, so, so many of them unemployed after decades of loyalty. If it were me, the city would burn of displaced anger. I do have a few other options thanks to my gramps and craigs list - but the story I have is that the bar will re-open for Halloween. Obviously Halloween is a big deal in Anoka and to not be open is ludicrous.

Lately, unemployed, I've been spending my days back in my hobbies. As guilty as the days can be, I do love being able to write everyday and practice music. Oh, and sweet sweet books. Jenny and I have been talking about converting one of our walk-in closets into a library. That would make my life, my room is becoming an issue - and it's harder every week because the problem just stacks up (pun! zing!). I should get one of those digital books. Except there's something so romantic about the real thing! What have I been reading...mostly Chekhov I guess. Can't get enough of him. My sister lent me the first Twilight book with the instruction that "I HAVE to read it". I bitched about it the entire time, and I'm sticking to my theory that I only read the whole series so that I could "rightfully" bitch. The last year I've also been getting really into buying used college literature books because they are full of short stories from authors I love that I otherwise probably wouldn't have come across. Can't get enough of John Daily's books, been reading a lot of Orwell too - he's good when you're unemployed, rub it right in.

This year I had my first real experience in sports, if you can call it that. Jenny, Tony, Jason, Tom and I joined a volleyball league for two seasons. We finished dead last the first season, and seventh of thirteen in our second. It is an absolute blast; I had no idea what I was missing. Beer ever floweth and balls...ever...goeth...yeah, good times. I signed on to a broom ball league with Jenny for this winter, and I'm sure I will die. I never really show my legs for how badly I bruise (ten on each now!) and from what I hear this is not a gentle sport. I will die. But! I will die dramatically, slow motion, colliding into a man twice my size and I will stab him in the heart with my broom as we fall through the ice (the collision, of course, as thunderous mammoths) and all will hear our hollering of born rivalry fade into the night from rising bubbles...nevermore...nevermore...

I've been with Tom Honey Biscuit Awaijane for one year and- Who's my Honey Biscuit? You are!- five months now. Livejournal, I have met my match. When I am not beating, strangling, or firing at him - we are very happy. He's much smarter and better than I am - and for someone like me - that's a challenge. It does help that he treats me like gold; woos, wines, dines, and is so supportive that I be myself and pursue what makes me happiest. Except when what makes me happiest is winning. He beats me at everything. EVERYTHING. Except scrabble. Nobody beats me at scrabble. I invented scrabble.
But most of all he is my partner in crime, we have so much fun together. I love that, I love that. I think we are seeing Where The Wild Things Are Tonight. Is it good?

Welp, that's my every-so-often update.
My job: NEED ONE.
Volleyball: BEST TIME EVER.
Drinking: USUALLY.

there is always somebody in the other room
listening beyond the wall.

there is always somebody in the other room
who wonders what you are doing
there without them.

there is always somebody in the other room
who is afraid you feel better being alone.

there is always somebody in the other room
who thinks you are thinking of someone else
or who thinks you don't care for anybody
except yourself in that other room.

there is always somebody in the other room
who no longer cares for you as much as they used

there is always somebody in the other room
who is angry when you drop something
or who is displeased when you cough.

there is always somebody in the other room pretending
to read a book.

there is always somebody in the other room
talking for hours on the telephone.

there is always somebody in the other room
and you don't quite remember who it is
and you are surprised when they make a sound
or go down the hall to the bathroom.

but there isn't always somebody in the other
room because
sometimes there isn't another room.
and if there isn't
sometimes there isn't anybody here at
These last few weeks have been a depressing blur of complete mental breakdown and maudlin family affairs and I couldn't really write about it if I tried. But I want to thank the people who have been taking care of me, and for the few things these weeks that have lifted some clouds.
Like our new roommate, Walrus.
He's furry, and would make a good stew.
The weather, it couldn't have been a better time for sunshine.
And getting to see Brand New rock first ave.
Also, the keg in our bath tub.

There is light at the end of the tunnel, and I always have been and always will remain the optimist - but I can also admit when things have gone completely to hell. Which they have. But I will drink to that, and play some shows. Here's hoping to digging myself out sooner rather than later.

End update, COME TO SHOW:
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The last few days have been good, and I blame the weather. The stir crazy/cabin fever has for the time been lifted. Just to open up windows and let air in, made all the difference.
Today I ran the air conditioner in my car.
I could have cried.
So this week the orphanage took on a bit of spring cleaning. We spent hours cleaning and re-arranging our living room. I had been saying for awhile that we needed some new feng shui because the cold weather had been so suffocating. Or I guess I felt I we needed to do something to make Tony stop pacing. We moved the furniture around a million times, but something was always off. Until finally we brought in the bath tub.

So there's this bath tub that has been sitting behind our garage for (I'm going to guess) years. It's painted red, white, and blue and one side of it is completely rusted to hell. So we shoveled all the snow out of it, brought it inside, and spent an hour bleaching the whole thing out. We filled it with pillows, blankets, and a picture of Bach.
It really ties the whole room together.

There was also a ladder behind our garage so we've spent a lot of time these last few days up on the roof. I felt like I could lay up there all day, the sun, I tell you THE SUN.
It's supposed to get cold again, and I spit on cold.

Went to Spring Brook Nature Center too, there was still a lot of snow on the trails, but it was so warm out. We went up to the train tracks, and smashed a penny when the train went by. I had never done that before. The train was going so fast the wind of it knocked me back a few steps.
I think I saw a goose that was drunk too.
Later that night I went to Majors with Jimmy and Tony, and ran into Stormi - who I hadn't seen in eons. I have a hard time liking Majors but had a hell of a time with the company.

Monday Madness was last night, which is always supreme. Over the years Monday's have become my official fun day. Davey is always in town, and it's the one night of the week everyone is around. So we took on the 34oz, and then played holdem. I've gotten rusty, I don't think I've played a whole game since the cabin.

All in all I am happy to say I was able to spend a lot of time out in the good weather, summer can't come soon enough.
 This week had a theme:


First, we wake up to standing water in our basement. That sounds like the worst thing ever, but ended up being the luckiest - by some strange mystical force that enjoys toying only with your emotions....not a single piece of band equipment was ruined. All the amps are raised anyways, but every guitar and bass (there has to be at least ten down there) all happened to be sitting on a couch,chair, or in it's case. But knowing how our basement usually looks, I think that might be the first time no instrument was on the floor. Even the tambourine was sitting on the arm of a couch.
But after the sighs of relief passed over, our basement flooded out 2 more times. We couldn't run anything in our bathroom or the wash machine. Twice we had to sweep and shovel all the water out of our basement.
Our floor looks really clean now though.

Then my car broke down. I went to see "The Number 23" with Jason, and on the way home my car was simultaneously over heating and running out of battery during the tail end of the snow storm. My headlights were running at about 10%, my blinkers didn't work, I had no dashboard lights, and the heat didn't work. And by that same mystical force that enjoys only toying with your emotions, it ended up being just a fan belt. But I would have totaled by car had it broke down before I got home....and the whole time I was waiting for it to self combust. When I saw the fanbelt it looked like a shoe lace.
But my dad rules and came over and replaced it for me, while the plumbers fixed the drain in our basement.


Finally I thought, all was repaired.
But then our washer didn't work.
I called my dad once again, because there are few things he doesn't know anything about - and he talked me through all the different problems it could be. None of them were the case though, and ended the call with my dad saying "I don't know, Laura, it just might be a broken knob or something".
That last sentence flashed into my mind a half an hour later, and I fixed the wash machine.
That's right.
I went down to the basement.
Stood in front of the machine.
Sized it up, while rolling up my sleeves.
Did a few quick stretches.
Spoke words of inspiration and battle....

And then I took the knob off......and then.....I put it back on.


Tune in next week, it's the episode about our house starting on fire but nothing getting burned.

Holy snow.
There's nothing like coming home at 6 in the morning to find tony running through the front yard with a cigarette in one hand and a shovel in the other, wearing shorts.
Holy snow.
I love when winter attacks us like this, because it seems the world is put on pause. Business is slow, everyone is shut in at home, but more importantly it's okay to be late everywhere. And for me, that's huge.

Last week bennigans gave me a good swift kick and decided not to schedule me. And the two shifts that I did pick up were only 2 hours long. So I spent the week writing a lot, cleaning, drinking, chillin, and settin up shows.

The daybreak/shoreline show friday was fantastic of course. The sound there drove me crazy though... the only place it sounded good was in the back - so it wasn't like going to a typical show - but all the bands played amazing and it was good to see a lot of people I hadn't seen in awhile.

Went to Amanda Roll's b-day party last week too, and I only intended on having a beer cause I was broke but by others generosity I ended up smashed. Interesting turn of events lead me and Nick and Max into the basement where we bantered politics for 4 hours. Hadn't done that in awhile, and oh, it felt gooood.
Speakin of Max, I got to see his show at Barley John's last week too - which was incredible. It wasn't at all what I expected, it was a completely chill night and I heard a lot of amazing tunes.

My siiister is back from Mexico. Visited my parents and had dinner and looked at all her pictures and heard about the trip. She is a tanned beach-babe. She got me a hand painted box that is right up my alley, it's gorgeous. I would have bought it if I were there, she knows me well. It was good to see her home safe and sound, and hear she had a great time.

What else did I do?

I made rice once.

Got coffee with Nick, Rich, and Ryan a few times...those are always good therapy. Especially with Ryan, thanks for all your sanity in my times of need :)

I had white castle for the first time.

Watched a bunch of Zelda, which is just continuously confusing being that three of the guys are playing it and all at different parts.

I finished 'What is the What.'

I saw Ghost Rider, which is a fantastic movie.

Aaaaaand hell, I already realize I need to update this more often because I forget everything.

But other than that, I will leave you with someone else's words:

She was just 17, pious and pretty with a deadly disease, and the weight of the world on her prosthetic shoulder. And by the summer of '96 her body was cracked like porcelain - just like some precious moments collectible in a hospital gown and a big bright golden halo. And so three cheers for my morose and grieving pals. And now let's hear it for the tears that I've welled up. We live lives that are rich and blessed and we'll burn for how we transgress. Now I've mastered the art of the open casket prayer and the singing guitar. And I've found the rewards weren't half what I'd hope for. And meanwhile we all feigned hope and nerve - as her parents went on and lied to her...all about the success of the surgeries and how my ex-girlfriend was no sleeping with her fiance.
If there's any justice in heaven, then God wont let me in.
He'll lock the gates and take my weekend pass away.
For this empathetic wait they'll see me off.
Reserve my golden crown while I am cursed to walk the earth for a millennium.

I know I deserve worse but it terrifies me and I can't take it anymore.

Today is a day dedicated to the lovers. A day created for the consumer. A day Hallmark walks a little taller....
But I love Valentine's Day.
I think I love today because I don't look at it as a day to recognize a lover I should have been recognizing all year. I think I love today because I realize the greater things in this life. Call it pretentious, but I don't think the people who don't like this fine day understand the true meaning of love.
How can they?
To ignore and disrespect a day where something beautiful is celebrated is absolutely ungrateful. Because we've all had it, at one time or another, we've all had it.
That one word that can get us out of bed in the morning.
That one word that an entire day of the year has been set aside for
That one word that I just keep so close to my heart...
The word, my friends:


If you hate today, you are hating on chocolate. The one thing we can always turn to! If you are one of those people who will spite and spit on Valentine's Day I will personally spit on you. You will not ruin this day for me. I've waited 364 days for this. A day where chocolate and I can run the streets uninhibited .
I want to take chocolate to a nice dinner, and then eat it.

So let's celebrate today. A day for the consumer? Yes. A day to celebrate love? Yes...
But more than anything, a day to celebrate my affections to the confections.
Last night was some sweet, sweet awesomeness. I had a date with my sister to go to Chino Latino's because I've wanted to go there my whole life. It was a be-lated birthday gift, and I was spoiled to the core. We drank, we dined, we laughed. I had a drink that was served in an entire pineapple, and a dessert shaped like a penis.

We went back to the orphanage and played some Wii bowling before heading out to Bennigans with Tony, Zach, Nick, and Max. It was the first time my sister and I went out and drank together. I had an absolute riot. My sister put all the pictures up on her myspace, but I'm gonna try and get the ones I have up somewhere too. When we got home Wii bowling turned into drunken Wii bowling, and a lot more pictures.
She also got me the most obnoxiously fantastic shoes you've ever seen.

All in all it was a night for the books, except for the fact that she slapped me with her glove. In the face. Nay, in the eye! Treachery!

Good day today too.

I woke up pretty early and went to Cub Foods with Tony and we bought a bunch of groceries so we could make breakfast. Tony made the most impressive omelet. I knew he had omelet skills, but the omelet he successfully flipped was bigger than my head. There was bacon, and toast, muffins and juice. We set the table and everyone sat down for a constantly interrupted breakfast. Phone calls, alarm clocks, oven timers, Jasons falling out of chairs - you name it. But in the end we were all ridiculously full, and couldn't move much.

After some post-breakfast-chill-time, Nick and I did the dishes and cleaned up the kitchen - and then i was off to my first day of my new occupation: Bennegins. I had orientation today so it was mostly a lot of paperwork about all the methamphetamines I can't take, and all the accidents I can't cause, but it was nice to see the back of the house and meet the important people I'm supposed to meet. First day of actual training is Saturday...
I hate learning new things. New things like table numbers.

When I got home I made an astonishing amount of mashed potatoes.

At about 10 I went up to perks to meet Rich, and chatted a bit with Dana and Ryan. I beat Rich at war because I rule at that game. It felt good to get some coffee in me, and when I got home I went nuts on finishing up my computer repairs, and created an extreme myspace video.

I thought I was going to finish up the night watching O Brother Where Art Though with Nick and Zach, but after the movie we stayed up and talked. We turned off all the lights, lit a few candles and watched it get light outside. I bought cereal today called Fairytale Flakes so we tried out some of that too.

And now I'm hitting the 24 hour mark of being awake, and going to end this good good day in the hopes that I will someday sleep when the rest of the world does.

I am a spyware ninja. I spent hours yesterday trying to fix my computer, and today it's running pretty as can be. Which means I can start recording, which means my life just got a lot better....I have so much to do.

I also started organizing all my pictures....which is a task. I have so many and they were all in a box with absolutely no order. So I sat up in my room with Amanda and went through them all, and it really cheered me up in a sad kind of way. I've had the same friends for so long that looking back 5 years ago is hysterical, but looking through them made me miss my family and my cabin. I think my sister might be coming with to Monday Madness tonight though, which will be a riot.


Tony's been borrowing my car lately because it's been too cold for his to start. But in return he brings me home sandwiches. If this keeps up, he can just keep my car - because I like sandwiches far more than transit.

Happy belated, Jimmy!!
For Jimmy's birthday Rich and I baked him a cake. But I didn't have milk or baking powder or anything, so I found a recipe online for a cake that had 4 ingredients in it. The 4 ingredients were stupidity, disgust, irony, and crap.
Needless to say, I've had better baking endeavors- but thankfully it was Jimmy's 21'st birthday so I don't think he noticed the cake crawling on it's own across the floor.
Oh haha. When I was online copying down the recipe, Zach sneaked up behind me and scared the shit out of me.
So later that night I gave him a spoon-full of shortening and asked him if he liked the frosting I made.